Nilekeni's dream UID System if starts working

Nandan Nilekani's.....Fully integrated ID card system for Indian citizens:

if starts working


Operator : "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut . May I have your..."

Customer: "Heloo , Heloo , can I order.."

Operator : "Can I have your multi purpose ID card number first , Sir?"

Customer: "It's he... , hold..........on......889861356102049998-45-54610"

Operator : "OK... You're... Mr Singh and you're calling from 17 Jal
Vayu. Your home number is 22678893 , your office 25076666 and your
mobile is 09869798888. Today morning you landed in India at IG
International Airport . Welcome back , Sir. Which number are you
calling from now Sir?"

Customer: "Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?

Operator : "We are connected to the system Sir"

Customer: "May I order your Seafood Pizza..."

Operator : "That's not a good idea Sir"

Customer: "How come?"

Operator : "According to your medical records , you have high blood
pressure and even higher cholesterol level Sir"

Customer: "What?... What do you recommend then?"

Operator : "Try our Low Fat Pizza. You'll like it"

Customer: "How do you know for sure?"

Operator : "You borrowed a book entitled "Popular Dishes" from the
National Library last week Sir"

Customer: "OK I give up... Give me three family size ones then , how
much will that cost?"

Operator : "That should be enough for your family of 05 , Sir. The
total is Rs 500.00"

Customer: "Can I pay by! Credit card?"

Operator : "I'm afraid you have to pay us cash , Sir. Your credit card
is over the limit and you owe your bank Rs 23 , 000.75 since October
last year. That's not including the late payment charges on your
housing loan , Sir.."

Customer: "I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdraw
some cash before your guy arrives"

Operator : "You can't Sir. Based on the records , you've reached your
daily limit on machine withdrawal today"

Customer: "Never mind just send the pizzas , I'll have the cash ready.
How long is it gonna take anyway?"

Operator : "About 45 minutes Sir , but if you can't wait you can
always come and collect it on your Nano Car..."

Customer: " What!"

Operator : "According to the details in system , you own a Nano car ,
...registration number GZ-05-AB-1107..."

Customer: " ????"

Operator : "Is there anything else Sir?"

Customer: "Nothing... By the way... Aren't you giving me that 3 free
bottles of cola as advertised?"

Operator : "We normally would Sir , but based on your records you're
also diabetic....... "

Customer: #$$^%&$@$% ^

Operator : "Better watch your language Sir.. Remember on 15th July
2010 you were convicted of using abusive language on a policeman...?"

Customer: [Faints]